Compass North Read online

  “Right, isn’t he overseas now?”

  “In Northern Ireland, living with his Uncle Declan.”

  “Goodness, that’s a dangerous place, his family let him go?”

  “Oh yes,” Tyann shook her head, her eyes still holding the disbelief she had all these months, of where Brody was.

  Her counselor saw the look in her eyes as she winced.

  “Please, tell me what you’re thinking.”

  “I gotta talk to my parents to see if they did any planning for college for me. I’ve worked for the past four years with my dad at his farm equipment business. I do repair work, help with the books and the marketing. But I’ve never gotten paid for my efforts.”

  “Good to talk to them, Tyann, you need to let them know what your future thoughts are.”

  “My mom and I, we talk. She’s a CNA, and she suggests that if I’m interested in helping folks, maybe in health care, that I go for a nursing degree, a BSN, and then RN. They get paid lots more money than my mom. She works so hard, but the pay, not so good, and the hours, well, they’re awful.”

  “Your mom knows; her advice to you is absolutely accurate. Tyann, you’re getting a very late start on what you want to do. Most students who’ve applied have already been admitted to their universities for next fall.”

  “And I’ve just started making up my mind. Mrs. Frasier, I have a really sinking feeling about the whole money situation; I had a boyfriend for a long time. We planned to marry once he returns from Northern Ireland. I kinda think that my folks assumed I would marry him and become a part of his family, that would be this coming summer or fall. And I hate to say this, but then they wouldn’t have to deal with me in a financial way.”

  “I can hear, your tone, that you’re having other thoughts about that whole situation.”

  “I certainly am,” she spoke with a firm voice.

  “You must talk to your folks about their ability to help you. As soon as you’ve done that, you and I, with your parents’ help must do a financial aid package, to see if it will be feasible for you to go on with school, if that’s what you want.”

  “I’ll do that, and also I applied for a scholarship to Iowa University.”

  “You haven’t heard on that one, have you?”

  Tyann shook her head to her counselor.

  “What’re you thinking of, a career?”

  “Nursing, helping folks, like my mom does. She’s shared so much about the folks she cares for. I’ve never really thought all that through, but I’m thinking about it now. My whole life’s been so me-centered, just me and my guy, and, of course, corn.”

  She smiled to Mrs. Frasier, got up and thanked her for her time.

  

  Tyann asked her parents to talk to her about money for college. She just put the meatloaf in the oven and poured coffee for her folks and her.

  “Mom, your day?”

  “Grueling, let’s talk about you.”

  “Tyann, your grandparents, Opa and Oma Hulfitz gave us $2,000 for you and the same amount for Mandy, that was after Mandy was born. It was money for your college educations, or whatever you decided your advanced training would be. We’ve socked the money away, in certificates of deposit. So the money, it’s increased in value a little. And Tyann, you never asked to be paid for working at the shop. I paid you a little for every hour you worked there over the past four years.”

  Tyann shook her head, “But I helped with the books.”

  Tyrone touched her hand, “This was my own little separate transaction, just for you, so you never saw it, in any of the bookkeeping.”

  “I’ll be blunt, how much?”

  “$3,000.”

  She smiled to her dad, “Wow, thanks.”

  Tyann paused, trying to figure out how to ask. She decided to just plunge in.

  “Mom and Dad, Mrs. Frazier says we must work on financial aid forms.”

  “We understand; $4,000 will not pay for your college education. We’ll try to help you. But what about Brody?”

  “One day at a time; we gotta see how things’ll go when he returns to his home. Right now, I’m not sure about anything with him. Our time away from each other’s been very revealing for me. When he returns, I’m pretty sure I’ll need more time to decide what I really want.”

  

  Conner and Tyann sat across from each other at the kitchen island in the Hulfitz home. She poured them lemonade, a Hulfitz family favorite in the spring and summer.

  “I never see you, Tyann, in school,” Conner spoke up after taking a big drink of the lemonade. “This stuff’s delicious.”

  Tyann smiled to him, “Knew you’d like it. Yeah, I know you never see me, glad you stopped by; there’s always the shop after school. What’s been going on for you?”

  “Well, I just got out of track practice. Have you heard from Brody?”

  Tyann saw a hint of sadness in his dark blue eyes, “Uh, you’re not telling me stuff. And no, I haven’t heard from Brody, gosh he’ll be back in country before long.”

  “What I can tell you is that it’s crazy, my last note from him, lots going on.”

  “Yeah, he wrote the same basic thing to me, Connor.”

  “Please go to Prom with me, Tyann. I’ve always wanted to go out with you, but I had a brother in my way.”

  “Way cool,” she gave him her wide smile, her green eyes sparkling, “I would like to go with you, our last Prom.”

  “Were you thinking of going?”

  “Yeah, I was going to go, to see all the beautiful young people all dressed up. I certainly am not afraid to go by myself. There’re always people who go by themselves.”

  “Uh huh, me too, I was gonna go alone. And sitting with you, in your kitchen, I just gotta tell you, I’ve loved you.”

  She saw his smile to her, and his telling eyes.

  He nodded his head, “For as long as my brother’s loved you, all these years. I stood in his shadow. But I’m not standing in his shadow now.”

  An electric shock feeling hit the inside of her head. She paused, swallowing hard, “Conner, you’re serious?”

  He watched her green eyes flare to a reddish brown, “Yes I am; I know you’ve always thought of me as Brody’s little brother, but you and me, we’re the same age.”

  “And I’ve always cared about you, just like I care about pops and momma, your folks.”

  “I’ve never heard you call them pops and momma, only their names.”

  “All the Mulrenan’s, you’re all special to me.”

  

  “What a surprise, I didn’t know he cared.”

  “Gosh, Mom, Brody, Conner, me, it’s been the three of us, for so much of what’s happened the past few years. I’ve always considered Conner the brother I never had.”

  “You didn’t say anything about that, the brother stuff?”

  “No way, I just think it’s so special that he’s asked me.”

  “Your dress?” Annie asked as she took the silverware out of the drawer for the dinner table.

  “Uh, huh, the dress I wore last year, with Brody, to his Senior Prom. It’s a beautiful dress; I’ll wear it again and again, to special stuff; it’s not just a prom dress.”

  “That’s what you told me last year Tyann, I just admire your no nonsense attitude about clothes, and about your hair and makeup, no fuss, no muss.”

  Tyann giggled to her mom, a little surprised by her comment. The giggle caught up in her mom and they both began to laugh.

  “You are my beautiful daughter, you are.”

  Tyann felt the tears burn in her eyes, as she hugged her mom.

  “I love you, Mom, thank you for my life.”

  “I love you, Tyann.”

  

  Jenny came up to Tyann and Conner as they walked from the dance floor.

  “I’m inviting you and Conner to join my guy and me, and my bro and Mandy for card games after the Prom, my house, my folks will have pizza and sodas ready for us.”

 
; “Thanks Jenny, that’s nice of your folks, a neat end to Prom night. I better call my folks after the dance.”

  “No need, Mandy already got permission from your mom and dad to come over.”

  Conner held Tyann close in the slow dance.

  “I’ve wanted to hold you near me for a long long time. After prom’s kinda awkward, it’s nice of Jenny to include us. It’ll be fun.”

  Tyann looked up into Conner’s eyes, “It certainly will be.”

  The six teens ate and ate, and the game of Hearts went on until they all began to feel weary. Conner drove Tyann home and walked her to her front door.

  “Thank you Conner, I had such a good time. You’re fun, and funny, and I never realized that.”

  “This is a special night, one I’ll always remember, Tyann.”

  She stood on tiptoe and he leaned down so she could kiss him on his cheek.

  “I care,” she smiled to him.

  “And I care,” he nodded to her.

  2

  1990

  “It’s Iowa State, for sure?”

  “Yup, for sure, pops and momma been savin’ all my life. Ty, what about you, that late start to figure out what you might want to do? Sheesh, I’m forgetting my manners, congratulations to you, our salutatorian, and a scholarship to Iowa, if you decide to go.”

  “Yeah, but no financial aid for next year, too late, I’m glad I tried, but I’ll be with Brody, so stuff’s kinda on hold. You still thinkin’ Vet School?”

  “Uh huh, but that means all A’s throughout my four years, undergraduate.”

  “Right, I know how difficult it is to get into Vet School anywhere, but Conner, you’re super smart.”

  They stood together in the Mulrenan living room. Tyann watched the balloons swaying as guests walked by. And the congratulations banner, she remembered Conner’s folks did the same thing for Brody last year. Tyrone and Annie Hulfitz joined Conner and Tyann.

  “Congratulations to you, Conner, you all set for, is it Iowa State?”

  “ISU, and I am,” he nodded to Tyann’s folks, “Brody’s gotta get back here, so I can go in the fall.”

  “When’s he due in?”

  “Next couple of weeks, I know Tyann’s getting excited,” Conner smiled down to her.

  She looked up to Conner and nodded. She smiled to her parents. Inside she felt an icy shield surround her heart. She overheard, listening to Conner, earlier during his graduation reception, as she walked behind them. Conner cut the cake as his dad stood nearby.

  “Pops, warning you, Brody’s changed.”

  “I’m sure of that.”

  As she walked away from them she told herself, “Try to let what you heard go, Tyann, ‘course he’s changed.”

  Yet the icy feel did not go away. She thanked Conner and his folks for inviting her and her parents.

  A wave of warm relief washed over her as she walked away from the home, like a second home for her for many years, “Dear God, I pray for Brody. You’re in charge of him, and of all of us.”

  

  Ten days before Conner and Tyann graduated Conner and his folks each got a short note from Brody.

  Conner read his note: “Little brother, I’m headed home, some earlier than I expected. I wrote pops and momma. But you’re the only one who knows this. I got shot, a raid. God’s thanks, I got away. My wound’s a bullet that grazed the side of my head; a scab now, can’t even see it. I got lucky I’ll arrive unannounced. You got your whole life ahead of you, college, then vet school. I gotta get there to take your place, like you did for me this last year. See you soon. Brody

  

  “Dad, can you give me this afternoon off? Brody’s back as of yesterday morning; he wants my help with moving hay bales, plus have dinner with the Mulrenan’s, a homecoming meal.”

  Tyrone smiled as Tyann stood in front of his desk at the supply office, “That’s right, you haven’t seen him yet. It’s quiet; mechanics have it under control. Hey, that’s very great he’s back. You two can make your plans now. Go, tell him hello and welcome back from all of us.”

  Tyann’s hands shook as she held the wheel, driving out past their home to the Mulrenan’s, half a mile down the county road. She parked at the fence that ran along the lane leading to the Mulrenan farm. Cars parked there when they visited the farm. She applied a little light pink lipstick, the only makeup she wore.

  After she knocked on the front door, she heard Sarah’s voice from inside,

  “Come in, in the kitchen.”

  Tyann stepped into the living room, “Sarah, it’s Tyann.”

  She saw Sarah smiling to her, “My dear boy, Brody, he’s got you back, inviting you to help with chores.”

  “Yeah, which I enjoy doing with him; dad gave me the afternoon off. We were pretty well caught up at the shop, for a Monday.”

  They hugged. Sarah pointed out the window, “Over there, at the big hay bales, he’s taking them down on the loader, moving them closer to the cattle. He’s anxious to see you.”

  “Hey, when did he get in?”

  “Really surprised us, showed up yesterday morning, about breakfast time. He didn’t want to go to church; we went to late service. He slept all day, ‘til dinner, jet lag. We missed you at church; I know you and your dad go early.”

  Tyann trembled as she walked outside toward where Brody worked. She swallowed hard, her throat dry. She felt her head spinning as she approached. She watched him scoop and load the hay bales on the loader.

  “Brody, oh Brody,” she shouted over the loader engine.

  He turned his head at her voice. She watched his smile as he lifted his hand to wave to her. She heard him shout out, “Tyann, you’re here, I love you.”

  Tyann saw it, a dip in the ground, that Brody didn’t see. The skip loader wheels bounced forward into the dip. It threw the loader off balance, the hay bales crashing off the loader and back onto Brody. The whole apparatus tipped to the side. Tyann could not see Brody for the hay and the loader. She heard the scream of the engine. Then there was silence.

  She stepped forward, just one step.

  “Go, get Sarah, for her to call for help,” she commanded.

  She ran into the house and found Sarah, taking a load out of the washing machine.

  “Sarah, call for help, the police; Brody’s buried, under the hay and the loader.”

  Sarah nodded to Tyann, who nodded back to her.

  “We both know; guide us, God,” Tyann whispered as she returned outside.

  “Don’t get close, Sarah, we’re not strong enough to move the bales away, wait.”

  They held on to each other. Sarah kept crying and saying, “My son, God, take care of my son.”

  Tyann stood, holding Sarah until Conner and Brenden arrived at about the same time as the Sheriff and a deputy. She heard the far-off scream of the ambulance. The next hours played like a movie as Tyann watched the events unfold in the Mulrenan back area. She remembered giving a statement to the deputy, as the only eyewitness to the accident. Everything else seemed to dim once she saw what remained of Brody. She felt helpless, but she did not cry.

  As her dad held her hand and moved her back into the Mulrenan home, it circled over and over in her mind, “I must save those I can; I must save those I can.”

  Sarah made pot after pot of coffee as folks mingled in the home. Tyann moved among the people she loved. Jenny arrived with her mom. They came up to Tyann and hugged her.

  She shook her head to Jenny, “Right now, I’m not really here. What’s spinning,” she pointed to her head, “are the barn dances, all the years of barn dances, that we all attended, right on this property, in the Mulrenan barn. The dancing and the laughter and the smiles, Brody, Conner, you, your brothers, Mandy, we had so much fun, happy times.”

  “Oh Tyann, what a grand memory you’ll have,” Jenny hugged her again.

  

  “Dad, I’m talking to God; please just let me go to my room when we get home. Jenny’s bringing my car fo
r me and her mom’s following. I just can’t drive now.”

  Tyrone looked over to his daughter as they drove back to their home. He touched her shoulder. She turned to him, a wide stare coming from her blank eyes.

  “God, watch over her,” he prayed as they arrived home.

  After Tyann rested for an hour she got up and sat with paper and pencil, writing. It took her 15 minutes to create her list. At the bottom of the page she wrote out what her mind spoke to her earlier, I must save those I can; I must save those I can.

  Mandy fixed pizza and salad for dinner that night. They ate soon after Annie got home. Her work let her off early to be with her family, grieving for Brody Mulrenan. Conner called a little later to invite them to Brody’s graveside service late Thursday morning after a private Catholic mass only for the family. After the graveside there would be a catered celebration of his life at the Mulrenan’s.

  “Mom and Dad, now that we know about Brody’s service, I must talk to you about my future.”

  Mandy sat in on the discussion because what her family figured out impacted her.

  “Sweetie, you’re in shock, do you want more time?” her mom touched her arm.

  “My wish,” Tyann took in a deep breath, “is to start right away at Iowa.”

  Her parents looked at her. She saw their puzzled blue eyes and furrowed brows, questioning her statement.

  “Dad, please come with me. I’m driving to Iowa City on Wednesday, to try for admission to Summer School, which starts next week. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking,” she nodded, “There’s a dorm open for summer school students.”

  “How many weeks?” Annie asked.

  “Ten, if they’ll admit me, I’ll work my butt off; that’ll be my ticket for the fall term. I think it’ll help if I show up in person.”

  “How’s that?”

  Tyann watched lines wrinkle Mandy’s forehead.

  She nodded to her sister and smiled, “Because I’ll be paying cash for the term; there’s no financial aid for summer. I know the school’ll like that. But they know I’ve got an IU scholarship, which will help pay for tuition for every term I make grades, that’s starting in the fall.”

  Tyann called Iowa’s admissions the next morning and got an appointment for 10 a.m. on Wednesday. She drove into work and walked into the shop. Her dad had his staff together for a meeting. She did bookkeeping for a little while in the office until her dad came in.